The Italian Gourmet-Baby-Food Baron's Ironically Pregnant Virgin Mistress

A new Harlequin parody is coming! And I got to play this time! I was so excited when I was told there was a chapter opening after all, I squeed like a four year old. Be thankful you didn't see it. Lemme tell you, writing badly on purpose is unbelievably fucking hard!

The co-conspirators: Tumperkin, Carolyn Jean, Ann Aguirre, Carrie Lofty, Bettie Sharpe, Meljean Brook, Kate Rothwell and lil' ole me!

And the blurb:

He needed children for an advertising campaign. . .

All Cesar Machismo wants is to ensure the bambinos of the world experience the flavor explosion of his company’s newest baby-food, Thai Shrimp in Peanut Dressing. But when he goes to an orphanage looking for a new spokes-baby, he finds twins with eyes the color of pureed Cornish game hens. Mama Mia! He must take them home!

What he got was a ready-made family!

Content with her lot in life, Chastity Bliss slaves for her stepmother at the orphanage. This way she stays with her babies, though she can never acknowledge them. When Cesar adopts her twins, she follows as their nanny. What can she do? She has no choice, because though he doesn’t know it . . .

Cesar is their father!